Blinded by the light!


I woke up early this morning, but still wanting to sleep. Speed had to wake up early this morning because he needed to get the shop cleaned up before some people came over today. A friend of Speed’s met a guy who wants to get his license so hopefully we might get some money out of the guy. Anyway, Speed told me that he wanted a big breakfast this morning (luckily he didn’t ask for sausage I hate cooking that). He asked for bacon, eggs, and biscuits, and I told him last night that I would cook the bacon in a frying pan; I think it tastes better that way, instead of the microwave. So I started making his coffee, and I put the water in the wrong area, like a major goober, because he just recently switched out the coffee maker and he’s been making the coffee lately so I haven’t seen how it’s been done. Luckily he drank milk through his breakfast and didn’t notice that the coffee wasn’t ready until later. Another good thing was that I didn’t waste the coffee granules, they were still okay. Basically all I did was heat up water. Surprisingly I didn’t burn the biscuits and we were both able to eat breakfast just fine. I cleaned up all the dishes and filled the dishwasher and got that going. Then I went to the bedroom to start getting ready and I noticed there were a few blood spots on my (NEW!) comforter which could have gotten there from the dogs (or hell they could’ve gotten there from my leg when I was pulling some thorny brush and when it finally came loose it stabbed me in the leg! Ah, the perils of ranch work!) So I decided I would have to put some stain remover on that and wash it. But I couldn’t wash the comforter and not the sheets, so they too come off. This seems to also upset Coco, seeing that now she has to get her ass off my bed!! Well now I’m on a cleaning roll….
I then begin to clean the three antique Lance peanut jars (only one of them has the original lid) that Speed had at his house that sat in a pantry and collected dust. Well I cleaned them up and set them on top of the cabinets up high, rendering them useless and also collecting dust. Speed had suggested using one of them on the counter to put the candy and nuts that are sitting in a separate plastic container. And I mentioned how kids like candy and if some come over (maybe some that I’m related to) and they want candy, (like all kids in their right mind do) they will want to open the jar and get the candy, therefore giving them a chance of breaking the lid and/or jar. He then agreed to put them on top of the cabinets.
The other day we went into town and bought some blinds. One for the living room, and two for the guest bathroom, two of them face the front of the house. Speed, like any man, likes to put off his Honey Do list. (“Honey do this, Honey do that”) Obviously when we purchased the blinds, my intention was that we were going to put them up. Well, Speed likes to put it off by giving me things to do. He told me that I would need to clean the window before he can put the blinds up. Whatever! So I humor him, and today I bust out my Dollar General window cleaner and I clean the window. I then open those suckers up (there are two of them next to each other) and pop out the screens and go outside and clean them. The windows not the screens, because those things are filthy and need a pressure washer! Once I clean them on both sides I now notice the dirt on the window sill and get the vacuum (Speed bought a new portable Ridgid when we got the blinds, I want to register for a big one for the house) Basically it’s not dirt, but hundreds of lady bugs that are dead. I have no idea why this is, but at any given time you will find lady bugs walking around the window, or flying by the lights. I want them gone! But I guess out of all the bugs to have crawling around in your house, lady bugs aren’t that bad! Besides that I can’t stand the curtains; the previous owners left them and there is a matching one for the kitchen window and the door to the utility room (there is more matching fabric I found in the hall closet!!). I take the one in the kitchen down and throw the tension rod in the hall closet, because I could use that again. I don’t take the curtain down off of the door because it blocks the window, the one that looks into the utility room. I then decide it’s time to take down the curtains in the living room. Plus they are going to be in the way when Speed finally puts the blinds up! They are so dusty I’ll probably be blowing the stuff out of my nose for a while! I take them to the utility room to be washed later. All of that goes into the washing machine too! Maybe I can sell it on eBay! Now I have to look at the hardware that was holding the curtains up, and they stick out way too far from the wall. That will be a job for later.
I decide that I can’t put the big living room blind up, but I could easily put those twenty-three inch blinds up in the bathroom! I put up a blind at one of my old places (the one where I lived on 13th St.) and was tough if I didn’t have a power tool, so I go to the shop to bower one from Speed. There are two of them that are in the corner, and I would have to kneel on some sort of box thingy, that probably holds all the plumbing for the bathtub. I get in there and open up a package of blinds, lay out all the parts, find the instructions and begin reading. Pretty simple really, screw the mounting brackets where you want the blind and then put the blind on it and bingo you’re done! I start to look at the window and where I want the blind, and I decide on it being flush to the wall. I put the bracket up there and mark where the screws will be and I then begin to put the first screw in. And this takes me forever! I try the electric screwdriver and that’s not working, the screw keeps falling out, because I’m also doing this upside down! That’s right; I’m mounting the blinds inside the window, therefore making this even harder for me! So I have to resort to the old fashion way and use a screw driver. While I’m going back and forth with trying to get the screw in, I’m thankful for the man who put a magnet at the end of these tools! Genius! One less thing I have to drop and look for! Also the sun is coming through the window and blinding me! I didn’t know I was going to need sunglasses to put blinds in. I’m also slowing heating up and starting to sweat and this in turn just keep frustrating me more. I finally get a descent look at the hole I’m making with the screw, wondering why won’t this damn thing go in, when I see some metal. HUH? I’m thinking….and then I realize it’s the strip of metal that’s put on corners to secure the sheet rock. OOOOOHHHHH!! OK! I got ya! I then make the logical decision to scoot back a bit! Genius! I move about an inch back towards the window, and start again. Let me tell you that the screw went in like buttah! I was all over it then. I got in both screws for the first one, and moved onto the next. I was worried that I wasn’t going to be even with the first bracket, but I managed alright with the tape measure, and “eyeballing” it. As I was twisting the last bits of the screw in, it was getting harder, and I had to lean more into the window. Earlier a thought wafted through my brain “I hope I don’t kneel too hard on this box thingy and break the sheet rock!” Well, that’s exactly what I did! The only thing that makes it OK is that it’s at the same spot that apparently someone tried to patch up before. So the crack I put into it was right along the edge of the old one. Speed isn’t going to like this, by trying to help things along and put up the blinds, I’ve in turn have made another item to be put on the list! Oh well, I’ll deal with that later, must keep going! ‘Cause I be damned if some crack in the sheet rock is stopping me from putting up this blind and keeping that damn sun out of my eyes!!!! I manage to finish without making the hole any worse. I put the blind on and voila! The blind is on, and give out a little “Oh yeah!” taking pride in this moment. I adjust the blind to block out the damn sun and begin to think about the other window. I decide that I can’t just do one, and that Mitch is heavier than me, and I already put a hole in the dam thing, he’s going to make it worse. And there really isn’t any reason for him to see to hole I made just yet…wink, wink. So at least this one isn’t going to be blinding me the entire time, and I’ve already geniusly discovered where to position the brackets, so I begin the next project. Getting them on was no big deal, they seemed to all get harder when I neared the end and I think I might be sore tomorrow, but I got them in, and the blind on!! I think they look great!! But I’m biased. They’re straight, and Speed will give the final approval I’m sure. But after doing those small ones, there’s NO way I’m going to do one that’s almost three times its length! That one will be saved for Speed!
What a busy morning! And it’s not even noon!
P.S. Speed saw the blinds and said “DAAAAAAAAMN! Pretty good!” I just hope he doesn’t expect me to do more!


About avathegreat

I'm a thirty-something unemployed teacher, who has recently moved out to the middle-of-nowhere and gotten married. My only job now is to find out what to do with the rest of my life and take care of a husband and several dogs on a budget all while trying to keep my sanity! Easy! Right?!

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